SHAKESPEARE’S CURSE, HARD ROCK BEAR, SHARON STONE, NUDE MAID, AND MILLION DOLLAR TOY
Old Bill Shakespeare may have taken himself too seriously. He laid a curse on his own grave in an effort to keep himself from being dug up. It’s said he penned it himself. He probably didn’t want to turn up as Yorick’s skull in Hamlet. The curse goes like this and is placed at the head of his grave: “Blest be the man that spares these stones, And curst be he that moves my bones.” Which brings us to the current problem. The old bard’s grave needs rennovation. The stones above his grave have started flaking from four hundred years of traffic in the Holy Trinity Church in Stratford-Upon-Avon. A work order has been issued that says “fix the stones but don’t touch the bones. “We’re avoiding the curse,” said Josephine Walker, a spokeswoman for the Friends of Shakespeare’s Church group. “We are not lifting the stones, we are not looking underneath, and the curse is for the bones underneath, so the curse is irrelevant for this work.” “It’s our wish that we conserve this without anyone knowing we were there,” said architect Ian Stainburn, who is working on the project. “We want to conserve it as it is and slow down the natural process of decay but we don’t want to recut it. It’s really a challenge.” I bet it is, especially if you’re trying not to anger a ghost. I can see where it would be difficult to work with a ghost quoting olde English pentameter at you all day. “We get 100,000 tourists a year, but they don’t walk on the stones,” Walker said. “But the clergy have to when they give communion, and the stones are flaking away, the surfaces are coming off. Shakespeare was baptised in the church in1564. Hopefully things will go well and Shakespeare will remain where he is, but then again, it might be interesting having William wandering around. “Bubble, Bubble, toil and trouble…”
BEAR VACATIONS AT HARD ROCK HOTEL
At Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida, a black bear was seen taking a dip in the pool at the Hard Rock Hotel. Bears like to vacation too. A security guard called police when he spotted the bear on one of his video monitors. I guess the bear didn’t have a reservation. The animal then proceeded to roam the grounds sight-seeing and in general enjoying himself. There’s no report on how he rated the hotel pool or the service. The hotel has not been evacuated and the black bear is still vacationing somewhere in the vicinity. Maybe he went to see if he could catch a couple of the rides. It’s the off season in Florida and he shouldn’t have to wait in line too long.
SHARON STONE PRIS?
Has anyone noticed how Sharon Stone looks like the Darryl Hannah character, Pris the psychotic android from Blade Runner? Why would anyone look like that on purpose? That’s karma Sharon!
NUDE MAID CLEANS OUT HOUSE
I know it’s hard to believe but once in a while, when you get something off the internet, it just might be a scam. Hmm, imagine that. That’s what happened to a man in Tampa, Florida. His wife was away, so he thought he’d play. He hired a maid off a website that would come to his house and clean it in the nude. She cost $100 an hour. Sheriff’s office spokeswoman Debbie Carter said the man told deputies he left the maid alone in the bedroom to clean. It appears he had only hired her for the show. When his wife returned home, she discovered $40,000 worth of jewelry had run off with the maid. I bet he’s in some deep do-do. Some guys you just can’t leave by themselves.
PERSIAN RELIC FOUND IN SHOE BOX
If you have an old shoe box under your bed, check it. You might get lucky. That’s what happened to John Webber. He remembered and old cup his grandfather gave him to play with when he was a kid and decided to see if it was worth something. The first estimates are placing the value of his childhood toy at a cool million dollars. He assumed the golden cup, which is decorated with the heads of two women facing in opposite directions, their foreheads garlanded with two knotted snakes, was made from brass. But he decided to get it valued when he was moving last year and was told it was actually a rare piece of ancient Persian treasure, beaten out of a single sheet of gold hundreds of years before the