Archive for the Politics Category

URINE WHISKY, ROBBING A STORE FULL OF COPS, HUNTING GHOST TRAIN-KILLED BY REAL ONE, and BRAZIL’S FIRE TORNADO

Posted in Entertainment, Food, Humor, Life, News, Politics, Random, Uncategorized, video with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 29, 2010 by mclassen

Whisky: pissky

Gilpin Family Whisky’s newest line, Urine Whisky

Somehow I just can’t picture myself walking up to a bartender and saying “Give me a shot of Pissky.” If you’re a connoisseur of fine whisky, here’s an exciting new concoction you probably won’t be interested in…whisky made from the urine of diabetic patients. Whoever thought of this needs their meds tweaked. The creation of London-based designer James Gilpin, the biomedical tipple – named ‘Gilpin Family Whisky’  – is created using the high-sugar urine produced by elderly diabetes patients, including Gilpin’s own grandmother. Now that’s just twisted. Hey Gram fill’er up, we need more booze. That’s just creepy. Gilpin, who is himself diabetic, filters the urine using the same processes used to purify water, removing the sugars in the process, which are then used in the fermentation stages. Hmm, fermenting urine, now there’s a work environment I’ve been craving. Not surprisingly, Gilpin isn’t planning to market the pee whisky commercially, instead, it’s more of an art project. Is that kind of like writing your name in the snow? But if you really fancy sampling some of the stuff, Gilpin will be showing it off at the 100% Materials design event in London, England in September, complete with tasting opportunities. I think that might be one booth I’d put on my list to be sure to pass up.

Robbery and a Store Full of Cops, Bad Idea

Two men have been arrested for shoplifting in Oregon after they decided that an event which saw more than 60 uniformed police officers in their target shop was the ideal time to carry out their crime. This is a perfect example of the thought processes gone wrong. According to Oregon police, the men were intially deterred by the ‘Shop With a Cop’ event for school children, in which children were accompanied round the shop by uniformed officers, while canine police units patrolled the store and mounted police officers waited outside. For a moment reason sets in, a gimmer of intelligence starts to shine, but according to Sergeant Pete Simpson, the men then hit on the cunning masterstroke of going ahead with the robbery anyway, cleverly deciding that the police would be so distracted by the children that it was actually the ideal time for a theft. Yes folks, logic gone horribly wrong, another fine example of why some people shouldn’t reproduce. Simpson says security guards at the store on Wednesday watched the two young men packing their own backpacks with blenders, shoes, clothes and tools while around them officers helped children pick out supplies for the school year, demonstrating to those around how not to successfully rob a store. According to The Oregonian newspaper, the two were promptly arrested in a joint effort between security guards and a number of police officers, while a clown entertained the children with some balloons. I’d say two clowns just signed up to entertain the police for, oh probably six months to a year. “Common sense didn’t play into their decision-making today,” noted Sgt. Simpson.

Ghost Hunter Hunting Ghost Train Killed by Real Train

There’s nothing in life like a little irony. A ghost hunter in North Carolina was walking along the supposedly haunted train tracks on a 100-metre long trestle when an oncoming train struck and killed him. There’s also nothing like being somewhere you’re not suppossed to be. Twenty-nine-year-old Christopher Kaiser and a dozen other amateur ghost hunters were on the tracks early Friday morning hoping to have ghostly sightings of a train that derailed at the site 119 years ago. Instead a real train with three engines and one car turned the corner towards them. I wonder how long it took for them to figure out it was all real? Everyone except Kaiser were able to run away unscathed, reports the Columbia Daily Tribune in Missouri. Before being hit and falling 30 metres off the trestle and into the ravine below, Kaiser pushed a woman away from the train. She was airlifted to a hospital but her condition is unknown. AOL News says that most of the ghost hunters are out-of-towners and some fled the scene because they were trespassing on railroad property. Yes this didn’t turn out how we expected, let’s flee prosecution. On Aug. 27, 1891 a passenger train derailed off the trestle near Statesville, NC and sent 30 people to their deaths. Legend has it that every year on the crash’s anniversary, the sounds of screaming passengers could be heard on the bridge. Now it’s the sound of screaming ghost hunters. Let’s see if someone ghost hunts the ghost hunter hunting the ghost train.

Fire Tornado Outside of Sao Paulo, Brazil

The heat is on: The fire whirl rips across a field in Brazil

Below is raw footage, no sound, of a rare Fire Tornado that touched down in Brazil. It’s brief, but amazing.

CARLSBERG BEER EMPLOYEES RIGHT TO DRINK, FIRST CLASS THIEF, KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN BREADLESS SANDWICH, and MAN’S PENIS STOLEN BY POLICE

Posted in Culture, Entertainment, Food, Humor, Life, News, Politics, Random, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 9, 2010 by mclassen

 Carlsberg staff responded to a recent beer ban by going on strike

Carlsberg Beer Empoyees Strike for On-the-Job Beer Drinking

Beer, one of the few things worth fighting for. At least it appears that’s what employees at Carlsberg Beer in Copenhagen, Denmark, think. Almost 800 staff walked out, with 250 remaining on strike after the new rules came into force. No more beer except at lunch. Wow, no more drinking on the job. Jens Bekke, spokesman, said that drivers retained a right to three beers per day outside lunch hours and that warehouse employees claimed the same right. Did he say a right? Does that mean their worker’s union negotiated beer into their contracts? The warehouse guys too?  “Yesterday, beers were removed from all refrigerators. The only place you can get a beer in future is in the canteen, at lunch. Because of that, the warehouse staff went on strike yesterday, with other staff striking in sympathy,” he said. I suspect at this point a lot of these employees have alcohol problems. Can you say withdrawal? They went on strike cause they all went to the pub in need of  beer. He stated that Carlsberg shipments from Copenhagen would not occur on Thursday and that delays would occur in the rest of the country. On the upside, weaving beer trucks on the highway would be severly reduced. Carlsberg’s trucks are fitted with alcohol locks, preventing drivers from drunk-driving. As many beers as they were allowed they didn’t need the locks. I’m sure a couple of carry-ons would fix that.

Thief in the Mail

Now, I have to admit for once, this one is pretty clever. A thief in Poland pulled off a series of robberies by climbing into large parcels and mailed himself to businesses,  then climbing out and having his way with them at night. Not bad eh? It gets better. Stanislaw Muchy, 39, would then make his getaway by sealing both himself and the loot in another box addressed to his Warsaw home. Mailed in, shipped out. How creative is that? Well, there’s always a flaw in every plan. His “best laid plans” came to an end after he fell out with an accomplice, whose job it was to deliver him to courier firms. He contacted police and reported the scheme. Well it looks like your P.O. Box is about to be cancelled.
After being tipped off, police said: “We arranged a special delivery of our own.” I bet they did. The only special deliveries he’ll be making will be through the rear entrance.

The KFC Double Down Sandwich: Say 'no' to bread

KFC’s No Bread Sandwich

Now from our disgusting mass of goo department, here’s the next brilliant, and I use that term sarcastically, innovation in the fast food revolution. It’s the no bread sandwich. I have to wonder what brilliant think tank came up with this one? KFC’s bosses reasoned that burgers just don’t contain enough meat, so have released the Double Down Chicken Sandwich, which says “no to bread” replacing it with chicken that sandwiches bacon, cheese and the Colonel’s special sauce. That’s what reasoning will get ya. Like I said, “Mass of Goo.” You really don’t want to try this with clothes you want to keep. The KFC Double Down sandwich website says “this one-of-a-kind sandwich” features “two thick and juicy boneless white meat chicken filets (Original Recipe® or Grilled), two pieces of bacon, two melted slices of Monterey Jack and pepper jack cheese and Colonel’s Sauce.” Don’t you just love the company propaganda. Well, we can only hope this remains a one-of-a-kind sandwich. Can you see giving this to one of the kids? You better hope you have a Labrador to clean the car and the kid. The Double Down is set to launch in America on April 12. Hmm. I’m thinking Arbys.

Police Sieze Furniture Store Owner’s Penis

It appears a case of penis envy has led to penis siezure by a law enforcement agency in Britian. 46-year-old Jason Hadlow’s prized stone Indonesian penis carving was snatched by police after a member of the public complained about the $400, four-foot phallus, which was on display in his furniture store window. That’s what happens when you show your penis in public. He was told to pay an $150 fixed penalty notice, or face prosecution for causing “harassment, alarm and distress” and was told he can only have his penis back if he promises not to put it on display again. No more Indonesian penis flashing for you. Hadlow, who runs the store in North Yorkshire, has now started a Facebook campaign for the return of the phallus, which he has naturally called the “Free Willy” campaign. What else would it be? His experiences have not discouraged him though, he told the Northern Echo that he’s ordered over a hundred more of the phalluses: “I have got a container of them coming in four weeks, which contains a minimum of 150 of the willies.” Wow, the police are going to need a warehouse just to house their arrested penises. Sounds like this could develop into a fixation. Local police said they were within their rights to seize the penis, insisting that Hadlow was “committing an offense.” Cuff ’em Dann-o.

MONEY TO GO, DON’T TELL MOM, HAIRDRESSER LSD BLINDNESS CURE, and ROADKILL AND DRUNK SAMARITAN

Posted in Animals, Entertainment, Food, Humor, Life, News, Politics, Random, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 26, 2010 by mclassen

 

Robbers called bank for money to go

Robbers Call Bank for Money to Go

Welcome to another moment of I couldn’t get it right if I tried. In Fairfield, Conn.  Police say they had ample warning of a bank robbery because the two suspects called the bank ahead of time and told an employee to get a bag of money ready. I suppose they wanted them to shove it out through the drive-up window too. Police arrested 27-year-old Albert Bailey and an unidentified 16-year-old boy on robbery and threatening charges Tuesday afternoon at a People’s United Bank branch in Fairfield. I’m just imagining how this conversation must have gone: “Hello, May I help you?” “Yes, we’ll be by in just  a few minutes and my partner and I are going to pob your bank. Could you be so kind as to have the money ready when we arrive.” “Why sir that won’t be a problem at all. We’re looking forward to doing business with you.” Sgt. James Perez says the two Bridgeport residents showed up about 10 minutes after making the call and were met by police in the parking lot. There’s nothing like crooks phoning in their own tip. Perez told the Connecticut Post the suspects were “not too bright.” Well, it goes to show you that making reservations is good for some things, bank robbery, not so good. Lesson learned? You need to actually have an IQ to be a thief.

Give Me All of Your Money and Don’t tell My Mom.

In this little story more ineptitude abounds. A teen robber asked a clerk not to “tell my mom” what he’d done before fleeing from the scene of his attempted hold-up in a Salt Lake City store. I have to admit, after that, the first thing I would do is call his mom. If he’s more afraid of her than the cops. that’s saying something about mom. Police said the teenager went into a convenience store early last Saturday morning and approached the counter with numerous items. So far so good. As the clerk put his supposed purchases through the till, the would-be thief tried to sneak behind him and hold a knife to his neck. A knife? If you’re going to enter a life of crime, you need real weapons. But the quick-thinking clerk spun around with his hands up and hit the teenager in the face, knocking him to the floor. I’m betting this kid was a computer geek that ran out of munchies playing World of Warcraft and thought the magic knife he got from the Dwarven master would hold its own in the real world. Wrong. Just before he took off, the teen asked his victim not to call the police and added: “Don’t tell my mom.” That really worked. Now its all over the internet and everyone knows. I hope your mom takes your WOW account away from you.

Shaman Tells Blind Man LSD Laced Gherkins Are Cure

We’re just full of them today. A “mystic” has been jailed for eight months after claiming he could cure a blind man by feeding him gherkins laced with LSD. How do you convince someone of that? “Eat this pickle man, it’s magic. It’ll cure what ails you.” Jobless hairdresser Patrick Baecker, 35, posed as a mystic healer and told Axel Pfeffer he would make him see for £20,000. (approx 40,000 USD) Apparently it didn’t work. Imagine that. The court in Fehmarn, Germany, heard how the former motorcyclist had tried everything to restore his sight after losing it in a crash. Yes lawyers are good at putting that poor poor pitiful me spin on things. Quick reality check, dude you paid a lot of money to a hairdresser who told you he’d cure you with a pickle. I bet they weren’t even brand name pickles. Baecker fed him pickles laced with powerful mind-bending hallucinogenic drugs to induce visions. You’ll see alright, but we didn’t guarantee what. “You are a hairdresser, not a shaman,” Judge Markus Faerber told Baecker in court. He’s also not a very good con man. Jail time for you.

Drunk Man Tries to Revive Opossum

We now round out our collection of screw-ups and yo-yos with this tasty tidbit. Police say they charged a Pennsylvania man with public drunkenness after he was seen trying to resuscitate a dead opossum along a highway. I wonder if the opossum is playing ‘possum? Now the other question… CPR or Mouth to Mouth? State police in Punxsutawney say several witnesses saw 55-year-old Donald Wolfe, of Brookville, near the animal Thursday afternoon. Hey, isn’t that the place where they have the official groundhog for Groundhog’s Day? Isn’t his name Phil? Maybe the guy thought he was saving Phil’s life, a hero of the community and all that. No, I’m not buying it either. Police arrested him along the highway, Route 36, in Oliver Township, about 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh. A state police news release did not specify how Wolfe was allegedly trying to revive the roadkill. And we thank them for that. That may have just been too much information.

 

WEREWOLF HUNTER ARRESTED, VAMPIRE BITES CABBIE, DUCT TAPE LESSON, and WOMAN CALLS POLICE ON POLICE

Posted in Animals, Culture, Entertainment, Ezine, Humor, News, Politics, Random, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on March 25, 2010 by mclassen

 

Werewolf Hunter Arrested in Washington  

I keep hoping this guy was just out LARPing and got seperated from his Dungeons and Dragons group. In Bainbridge Island, Wash., Police have detained a man who was found wielding a sword in a parking lot where he said he was “hunting werewolves and chuds.” Sounds like LARPing to me. For those that aren’t geeky enough, LARP stands for Live Action Role Playing. Now you’re all caught up and you can laugh the jokes. At approximately 1:45 p.m. Tuesday, police responded to reports of the man aggressively waving a sword around and stabbing objects in a parking lot. That’s the first place I’d look for werewolves. Officers found the shirtless man standing in front of the store with a large nanite sword in his hand. The man had several scrapes and cuts on his body, officers said. Forsooth it seems he’s engaged the foul beasts. When instructed to put down the knife, the 35-year-old man did so without incident. Officers also found on the man several throwing knives and other sharp weapons. He’s hunting werewolves, did you think he’d be unarmed? The man told investigators he was “hunting werewolves and chuds” who, in many cases, take the form of humans.  Based on this information, the officers took the man to Harrison Memorial Hospital for an evaluation. Good decision. Officers said the man had also been spotted approaching customers and displaying his sword and knifes near Ace Hardware in the past. Ace Hardware, a front for a clan of Werewolves? Hmm, the guy in the power tool section did look a little…naw.

Vampire Attacks Cabbie During Robbery

Wow, more vampire stuff, all of a sudden they seem to be coming out of their coffins. New York police are hunting a “vampire” attacker who bit a taxi driver during an attempted robbery. The man attempted to rob the cab driver after allegedly pulling out a semi-automatic handgun. I think I might have handed over the cash. The sight of guns do that to me. When the driver refused to hand over any cash, the man proceeded to bite the driver on the neck. Bites were found on the drivers neck, arm and back. Sounds more like a mad dog than a vampire. I hope he got his rabies shots.  The ‘vampire’ fled the scene of the attack shortly afterwards, after failing to steal anything from the cab. Another sucessful day in the world of inept crime. The attacker only began his attempt once he had arrived at his chosen destination near Bronx Community College. Get out the stakes, light the torches, his coffin must be nearby.

Duct Tape not acceptable for silencing the little woman

A Florida man was sentenced to 90 days in jail and a year probation for binding his girlfriend’s hands and taping her mouth shut “so she would listen.”  OK, I admit, I’ve had these moment where, yes, I thought about it. But dude, you don’t actually do it. Kevin John Franco of Port St. Lucie pleaded no contest to felony false imprisonment, misdemeanor battery and tampering with a witness after the sleeping woman woke to find him binding her hands with heavy-duty plastic ties. I have to ask, what’s with this tampering with a witness charge? During the October 2008 incident, he also taped her mouth shut with duct tape, TC Palm reports. He apparently wanted her to listen real good.  The victim was able to free herself as Franco ripped the phones out of the wall. Uh, Oh, I’m sensing a poorly done tie job here. She used a cell phone to call police.  The 34-year-old man admitted to police that he tied her hands and taped her mouth “only so she would listen.”  I wonder if the judge will listen. I bet he won’t be able to duct tape him.

Woman Calls Police to Get Her Out of Jail

Ever come across one of those people that just seems to have something missing? This would be one of those people. 29-year-old Carly Houston was arrested in Naperville, Illinois after she allegedly screamed and swore at a taxi driver when he asked for directions to her destination, and then refused to pay the fare when police showed up. Obviously she has issues. She was arrested and taken to the local police station, where she was offered the chance to make a call to a friend or family member. So far so good, but here’s where it all goes so wrong. Instead Houston used the call to dial 911, which connected her to Naperville police dispatchers, to whom she reported that she was “trapped inside the detention facility.” Ok, what brain process could have happened here that could remotely make this seem like it was a good idea? Unfortunately for her, the Naperville police department proved strangely reluctant to free her from the clutches of the Naperville police department. Imagine that. Instead, she was charged with “theft of labor or services,” criminal trespass, disorderly conduct and, for good measure, making a false 911 report. somehow I’m guessing, all that shouting she was doing at the cabbie somehow was carried over to the arrest and frankly, they’d heard enough.

FLORIDA VAMPIRE RUNS FOR PRESIDENT, LEPRECHAUN ROBS BANK, and LEANING PUB OF BEER

Posted in Entertainment, Humor, Life, News, Politics, Random, Travel, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 19, 2010 by mclassen

Not satisfied with living in Florida, Jonathon _The Impaler_ Sharkey wants to move to Washington, D.C., to become the nation's first vampire president, reports CBS affiliate WTSP.

Vampire Runs for President….as a Republican

Right now I’m laughing pretty hard. There just seems somthing so appropriate about a Vampire in politics. Maybe it’s all of the “sucking the country dry” jokes I’m currently thinking of. Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey wants to move to Washington, D.C., to become the nation’s first vampire president. Well, with that nickname, it ought to make for some interesting foreign policy. Sharkey, 45, spent Friday on a Greyhound bus with his new fiancee, Audrianna Foster, a 19-year-old girl from Ohio he met online. She too believes she is a vampire, or vampyre. Well, he should fit right in, he already has the arm candy wife. “The Impaler” claims he’s a direct descendent of Vlad II the Impaler, better known as Dracula. And people holler about Obama’s lineage, good luck finding the birth certificate on this one. He has scheduled a Monday press conference in Tampa to announce his plans to file paperwork to run for President of the United States in 2012. He recently switched his party affiliation from Independent to Republican so he can run with the G.O.P. He should fit right in with those bloodsuckers. He ran for Governor of Minnesota in 2006 and also had short-lived bids for U.S. Senate in 2000, U.S. President in 2004, and U.S. President in 2008. Hey maybe third time’s the charm. Anyway, let’s check out Sharkey’s record shall we? He’s accused of “brainwashing a 16-year-old in Minnesota. That should prepare him for politics. The two were engaged until last month. Her family now has a restraining order against Sharkey and claims his texts to her violate it. He reportedly admitted to harrassing another 16-year-old Minnesota girl online in 2009. I think I’m noticing a pattern here. Dude wake up, they’re not old enough to vote. He was arrested in Tennessee several years ago and is currently on probation from Indiana after he was found guilty in 2009 of intimidating a judge. I like that one. He’ll fit right in in Washington. He served six months in a Marion Co. jail before his release. Sources confirm the Secret Service has had to keep him on its radar, since he moves around the country. Well, they might as well get used to it. If he wins they’ll have to protect him…from Vampire Hunters. Is Buffy still 16?

Leprechaun Bank Robber in Nashville

It appears this Leprechaun had lost his pot of gold and wanted to replace it with bank notes. A man dressed in green and carrying a large-caliber gun held up a branch of the First State Bank in the Nashville, Tennessee,  suburb of Gallatin on St. Patrick’s Day, said police spokesman Sergeant Bill Storment. The costumed man, wearing a green top hat, vest and shorts and a fake brown beard and wig, had previously gone into the Fifth Third Bank next door, according to its manager Sharon Riehemann, when the bank lobby was crowded with lunchtime customers. “He started to come in, then looked at his watch, then turned around and left,” she said. Apparently there wasn’t enough gold in that one. “He then walked toward the other bank, and a couple of minutes later he ran out of the bank with a blue bag in his hands,” Riehemann said. Police said two men were in the car that sped away, and that they fired at police during the chase, disabling one police car. Storment said the two ditched their vehicle and ran into a field near a subdivision. “They were killed while exchanging fire with officers,” he said. Isn’t it bad luck to shoot a Leprechaun. He apparently had run out of lucky charms as well. No officers were injured, and money was recovered from the suspects’ vehicle, he said. The robbers should have stuck with green beer.

Crooked House tavern

The Crooked House Pub

 Here’s a drunkard’s dream if I ever did see one.  The appropriately named Crooked House has been labelled Britain’s drunkest inn, and for good reasons. Glasses regularly slide across tables at the Georgian pub and coins appear to roll up, rather than down, the bar. This would be so much fun. The tavern, which was built as a farmhouse in 1785, got its design fault through settling of the ground caused by mining during the 1800s. It means that one end of the Crooked House is 1.2m (4ft) lower than the other. So, if it feels like you’re walking uphill to get a brew, you are. The alehouse in the Staffordshire village of Himley has become a big tourist draw. “I look after 1,800 pubs for Marston’s and this is definitely the one that leans the most,” said Sonny Mann, property surveyor for the brewery. I wonder how much sampling of the local wares he does? “The pub’s quite safe though and hasn’t moved for ages. We use special ‘glass tails’ over cracks on the walls – if the glass breaks then we know it’s moving again.” It’s either that or another drunk has fallen off his stool, rolled downhill and collected in the corner. “Hey bartender, set me up again, would you?” I’m thinking, drinking here would be a perceptual challenge. After a few pints, aiming for the door might be a project.

a bar

CANADIAN WOMEN’S HOCKEY TEAM BEER AND CIGARS, CHICKEN WING BANDITS, and ZOMBIES WIN APPEAL CASE

Posted in celebrities, Culture, Entertainment, Food, Humor, Life, News, Politics, Random, Sports, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , on February 26, 2010 by mclassen

Party at the Olympics

If you’ve been living in a box and haven’t heard the women’s Canadian Hockey Team won a gold medal. Congrats, I say. But what? Some party poopers didn’t like the fact that the victorious ice babes celebrated winning one for the “Home Team” with beer and cigars.  The International Olympic Committee will investigate the actions of Canadian women’s hockey players who celebrated their gold medal victory Thursday night by swigging beer and smoking cigars on the ice in Vancouver. A number of players, including 18-year-old superstar Marie-Philip Poulin, were drinking alcohol on the ice following the team’s 2-0 defeat of the United States. Hmmm, let’s see the single greatest moment in your life and you have a couple of beers, I’m thinking the IOC should be happy they weren’t driving. (The legal drinking age in British Columbia is 19.) Players lingered for more than 70 minutes after the awards ceremony reveling in the arena. Gilbert Felli,  the IOC’s executive director of the Olympic Games who has his panties in a bunch over this, said that drinking in public was “not what we want to see” from athletes at an Olympic venue. Ah, that’s the problem, someone saw them, hippocrittical jerk. In other words, if they would have done it somewhere they weren’t seen by the media, it was alright. Steve Keough, a spokesman for the Canadian Olympic Committee, told the Associated Press, “We condone celebrations. … We don’t condone actions of irresponsibility. I think Canadians understand it’s quite an emotional moment for our team. It was not our intention to go against any IOC protocols.” I didn’t see any of the team’s parents out there trying to jerk them off the ice saying “Naughty, naughty.” Actually if they would have been one of my kids, I’d have brought the beer. Congrats ladies, we’ll be seeing you at the Zamboni races.

Beware of Bandits with the Munchies

Police in Columbus, Georgia are searching for a pair of hungry bandits who stole an order of chicken wings from a pizza delivery driver. Now you know times are really tough. Columbus Police say the 19-year-old Domino’s driver was approached outside a home Tuesday night by two men who asked for money. One of the men pointed a chrome pistol. No wonder they needed money, designer handgun maybe? Police say one of the men then said, “give me the wings.” Put your hands up and step away from the chicken wings. They fled the scene with the $36 order. So what do you do, shadow a delivery guy until he hits his destination and then rob him during delivery. I can see this showing up in some teen movie somewhere.

A US court has ruled that 'Zombies have free speech rights'

Court Rules Zombies have Freedown of Speech

If you’re a zombie fan, I know I am, you’re going to love this. A court rules that horror-movie style zombies have the right to free speech after a group of protesters dressed as zombies were arrested by Minnesota police. Do Zombies actually talk? I guess it depends on which movie you watch. A court has allowed a group of protesters dressed as zombies to continue with a lawsuit against police who arrested them for disorderly conduct. Were they eating anyone? The appeals court overturned a previous finding that the group had correctly been arrested over a 2006 protest in a shopping center. I’m impressed this made it to an appeals court. Their lawyer was obviously NOT a zombie.  The group had been wearing makeup designed to make them look like extras in a horror flick, with white faces, fake blood and black circles round their eyes. They then proceeded to stagger round the shops, urging consumers to “get your brains here”. Must be the brains they were selling was those of local law enforcement. They also carried audio equipment, which police described as “simulated weapons of mass destruction”, even though they were mobile phones. Apparently police got their intel from the same people George Bush did. The appeals court ruled that the police had no reason to imprison the protesters simply for “dressing as zombies, and walking erratically in downtown Minneapolis.” It seems to me that describes a lot of people in Minneapolis.

Serial Butt Sniffer, Racist Computers, An Elephant and Its Dog, and Words From John Lennon

Posted in Animals, celebrities, Entertainment, Humor, Life, News, Pets, Politics, Random, Uncategorized, video with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 22, 2009 by mclassen

 Watch Out for the Phantom Butt Sniffer

In England, a man has been caught on closed circuit TV sniffing people’s butts. Yes, that’s right, butt sniffing. Police are searching for a man who crept up 20 times on an unsuspecting supermarket worker while he was stocking shelves and knelt behind him to smell his bottom. That is so creepy. The footage shows the sniffer pretending to chose items from shelves before crouching down behind the employee and smelling his buttocks.The employee became suspicious and informed his manager who checked the video before Devon police were called. The victim said, “I had no idea what was going on. I thought it was all a bit strange.” Strange is not the word for it. I’m thinking “disgusting.” To see the CC video of this, go here: http://www.aftonbladet.se/webbtv/nyheter/utrikes/article6333349.ab

Hewlett Packard’s Weird Video Tracking.

This is turning out to be a day for videos, but here we go. Evidently Hewlett Packard computers are racist, if you follow the rationale of this video. It shows how HP’s webcam software which is supposed to track the movements of a person’s face, doesn’t work too well if you’re African American. Desi (African-American) and Wanda (Caucasian), our two stars of the video, appear to be workers in some sort of consumer electronics store. It’s pretty clear that the software seems to think Desi is invisible. At least Desi and Wanda seem to have a good sense of humor about the issue. Granted, it’s just a bug, but a hilarious one. HP believes its software is having “difficulty ‘seeing’ contrast in conditions where there is insufficient foreground lighting. It appears to me that HP doesn’t hire any Africa Americans in their product testing Department. At any rate, watch the video It’s pretty funny:

 

 Animal Best Friends. There is an amazing lesson here.

Christmas Wishes from John Lennon