Archive for Salt

MARTIAN DISCOVERY, MRS EIFFEL TOWER, PORTA-JOHN MISHAP, DERRIE-AIR, AND DWI COOLER

Posted in Art, Books, celebrities, Culture, Entertainment, Events, Ezine, Family, Food, Humor, Life, Love, Media, Movies, Music, News, Personal, Photography, Poetry, Politics, Random, Religion, Sports, Technology, Thoughts, Travel, Uncategorized, video, Writing with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on June 7, 2008 by mclassen

STRANGE WHITE CRAP FOUND ON MARS

Is this what we paid billions of dollars to find? A bunch of white crap on the surface of Mars. For god’s sake let’s get on with it. Either send somebody there or give it up. Scientists say this could be salt. Yippee, we found seasonings. The Lawrys corporation should be thrilled. “Salt would be very interesting because that’s what is left behind as water evaporates. That would be a very nice discovery, particularly if we knew exactly which salts they were,” principal investigator Peter Smith said. Why, so you can decide between pork or beef? The scientists are eager to find evidence of water on the surface of Mars because they are trying to determine if the Red Planet has ever supported life. Does that really matter? It doesn’t any more. It’s not going to be a sunny vacation spot. I’m not going to be impressed until some Martian creature walks up and kicks the lander. Then I’ll be impressed. After that, I want to know if there’s enough of them to have a hunting season. The lander has already returned the highest-resolution pictures ever taken of dust and sand on the surface of another planet. What an accomplishment. Dirt. We knew that already. Colored dirt. We knew that too. There you go, billions to probe the deepest, darkest, dirtiest secrets of Mars with a little salt thrown on it. Stay tuned for more startling revelations from paradise. 

Whitish material appears in Mars soil, June 3

WOMAN MARRIES THE EIFFEL TOWER 

San Francisco, California resident, Erika La Tour Eiffel, yes, that is her real name, married the Eiffel Tower. eiffel-tower-marry-_676203c.jpgHer strange relationship with the architectural icon is the subject of a documentary, The Woman Who Married the Eiffel Tower; the documentary also stars the wife of the Berlin Wall whom we featured here a while back. There’s nothing like giving these folks a little TV time to validate their weirdness. I guess every landmark needs someone to love. There’s nothing like a cold steel rail.

DRUNK, NAKED AND STUCK IN A PORT-A-JOHN

People endlessly amaze me but how they get into some situations is completely baffling. Take this story for instance. Police in Lebanon, Pennsyvania get a 911 call from a cell phone that has originated inside a porta-potty. A man has gotten himself stuck inside. Lock jammed? No. For some unfathomable reason he has gotten naked, is drunk and has immerssed himself in the holding tank. Deputy fire commissioner Chris Miller said “I’ve been on the job in one form or fashion for 21 years, and this is the first porta-potty rescue I’ve ever had.” Police charged the man with public drunkeness and creating a health code violation, but they have no idea why he was in the toilet with his clothes off. I hope they hosed him off before they threw him in the cell.

FLY DERRIE-AIR

 Derrie-Air the new airline that charges you by the pound. The more you weigh the more you pay. Yes, under the guise of being environmentally friendly, this advetisment for a new airline has been circulating around the east coast. Well, It’s a joke folks. The airline doesn’t exist and you reservations have been cancelled.  It was an ad campaign to see how people respond to certain types of advertising. So it looks like you won’t be flying by the seat of your pants on this one.

BUSTED DRIVING MOTORIZED COOLER DRUNK

Did you know that you could get arrested for driving your cooler after consuming too much of what’s inside? Well it is true believe it or not. Yes you can get arrested for driving your motorized cooler drunk. Leslie J. “Bomber” Marr learned this the hard way when he was arrested on Memorial Day in Whitehall, NY and charged with DWI and aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle. Police saw him swerving around the streets and driving on the sidewalk on a cooler. Cruizin Coolers are becoming the newest rage in summer time transportation. Yes, you can drive you beverages to your favorite beach.  It even has a hatch so you can pull out a icy cold drink while driving. That’s where the trouble begins. The hatch also has a cup/can holder on top, suggesting that this sort of activity is exactly what the designers had in mind. Not much of a leap in deduction there. Under state law, the cooler is still considered a motor vehicle so sobriety is a must, and a license is highly recommended. Do they have driving tests for a cooler? Do they have a special cooler driver’s license? Buzz around buzzed carrying your buzz. There’s a certain beauty in that.

Man Arrested for Driving a Cooler While Drunk

REAL IRONMAN, CUB SCOUT FRAUD, ASIAN PHOTOGRAPHY, CARVED HEART, AND VINCE YOUNG

Posted in Art, Books, Culture, Entertainment, Events, Family, Food, Humor, Life, Love, Media, Movies, Music, News, Personal, Photography, Poetry, Politics, Random, Religion, Sports, Technology, Thoughts, Travel, Uncategorized, Writing with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on May 18, 2008 by mclassen

 COULD IRONMAN BECOME REALITY?

Stephen Jacobson, a design engineer has created an exoskeleton that can increase his strength 20 times normal. It is a robotic suit that a man fits inside and can accomplish tasks that no normal human could even dream of doing. Jameson works for the development and design firm, Sarcos Inc. in Salt Lake City and is under a two year contract with the U.S. Army. Talk about reminiscent of Tony Stark and Stark industries. Though the suit is much bulkier than Ironman’s streamlined sci-fi look, it is only in the beginning stages but it does operate with many of the same principles in mind. Sarcos’ Jacobsen envisions factory workers someday using the technology to perform manual labor more easily, and firefighters more quickly carrying heavy gear up stairwells of burning buildings. Disabled people also may find uses for the technology. “We see the value being realized when these suits can be built in great numbers for both military and commercial uses, and they start coming down in cost to within the range of the price of a small car,” said Jacobsen. From Comic to reality, we could have a bunch of Ironmen running around. I think Marvel Comics should ask for royalties on this one.

 

 

CAN’T EVEN TRUST A SCOUT ANYMORE.

A former Bethlehem, Pennsylvania woman will serve up to 23 months in prison for having her 7-year-old son dress as a Cub Scout to collect money for a nonexistent cause. Now that’s just low. Sally Ann Gombocz, 51, told a Northampton County judge she wanted to apologize to anyone she hurt. I’ll bet she did. Getting your kid to panhandle as a cub scout is seriously twisted. She previously pleaded guilty to theft by deception and corruption of a minor. Gombocz had her boy tell people he was raising money for a camping trip and collected all of $69. Gombocz was sentenced Friday to six to 23 months in the county slam. She also was fined $2,000, ordered to perform community service, take parenting classes, have psychological counseling and submit to random urine screens. She also must pay restitution. I wonder if it was all worth it? That’s what you get for trying to give the scouts a black eye.

WHAT ARE THESE GUYS PHOTOGRAPHING?

OK, they didn’t teach me about this in my photography class. Check out where these cameras are aimed. How come I never get invited to these kinds of photo ops? People are aressted for taking these kinds of pictures. Actually I’ve written about people arrested for taking these kinds of pictures. It appears, in Asia, anything goes, including the lens up the skirt.

GIRLFRIEND STABS BOYFRIEND ACCIDENTALLY DURING WEIRD SEX.

Catherine McCoubrey, 25, and her 24-year-old partner had been drinking heavily. It’s amazing how alcohol would figure into this. He apparently asked her to carve the shape of a heart in him during what prosecutors called “rough sex” in February 2007, but unfortunately, she pressed too deeply. Someone has been living in the woods too long. Defence lawyer John McAmmond said the unnamed victim introduced his client to “body modification”, and had carved himself with knives before. Get a hobby. I’m thinking, something that doesn’t deal with sharp objects. McCoubrey, from Winnipeg in Canada, has now been given three years’ probation after pleading guilty to assault. The boyfriend has taken her back. Someone put the knives away.

VINCE YOUNG PARTY ANIMAL

Another NFL Quarterback parties hard. Vince Young was caught in a bar in Austin, Texas, throwing back tequila with the best of them. Matt Leinart was caught about a month ago doing beer bongs with sorority girls at his house. It appears Young took this as a challenge and is trying to outdo Leinart. Vince forgot one very important thing though, the sorority girls! It appears from these pictures that Vince may have walked into the wrong bar. I wonder if they’re listening to the Village People? Is this a male topless bar? Are those bedroom eyes looking at Vince in the second picture? Could he be the Tennessee Titan?

Vince Young