HILLARY CLINTON CONCESSION, BASEBALL FUNERAL WINNER, FLY LONGEVITY, LOST LIGHTHOUSE, AND TOWEL TUMOR

HILLARY CLINTON WILL CONCEDE

Certainly this was inevitable but, I have to admit, I’m going to miss her, though I don’t believe for a minute she’s out of the picture completely. She has made a statement that she will concede the nomination to Barack Obama on Saturday. She also is saying that she will continue to support the Democratic Party. The way they’ve treated her, I think she’s being quite magnanimous. She has proven over the last few weeks especially, that she is an incredibly gutsy lady. The press has villified her and nominated Barack Obama for sainthood. It is the same with the Democratic Party which blatantly stacked the deck against her. It was certainly a sad way to operate. I’ve never been a political supporter of Hillary, but I have grown to admire her. In the last few weeks she became more “real” and down to earth than we’ve seen in a candidate in a long time. I think no matter which way this election goes now, the American public loses.  

Young College Hillary

Starbucks Hillary

Photobooth Hillary

Relaxed Hillary

Hippy Hillary

BASEBALL FAN GETS FREE FUNERAL

I’m not sure I’d be all that thrilled by winning this. Elaine Fulps is thrilled about the prize she won at a minor league baseball game. But she’s hoping she doesn’t have to collect on it anytime soon. Fulps, 60, won a $10,000 paid funeral at Tuesday night’s Grand Prairie AirHogs game. “I’m going to pick a spot under a tree out of the Texas heat,” she said. “And let’s hope it’s a pet-free cemetery. I don’t want to get watered on.” At least she has plans. Some finalists for the prize arrived dressed in black or looking like death. There were events for the finalists too. They participated in a pallbearer’s race, a mummy wrap and a eulogy delivery. These are certainly strange events for a baseball game. I think the Texas heat has gotten to the management. I have no idea who won the game or who the Airhogs were playing. It seems that the game just passed on.

STUDY ON THE LONGEVITY OF A FLY

I don’t know who’s idea this was but in Switzerland, at the University of Laussane, a study was done that proves the stupider flies are, the longer they live. Scientists Tadeusz Kawecki and Joep Burger said Wednesday they had discovered a “negative correlation between an improvement in a fly’s mental capacity and its longevity”. Why would you want to know this? Do we want more intelligent flies? These two actually took the time to breed 30 to 40 generations of flies and then tried to train them to be smarter. They succeeded, but the downside was that the flies had a shorter lifespan.  The flipside was that the flies left in their natural state lived longer on average than their IQ enhanced counterparts, with a lifespan of 80-85 days rather than the normal 50-60. How much money and time was spent on this? Sombody needs to tell me why this was important.

DID YOU EVER LOSE A LIGHTHOUSE?

A lighthouse from Wellfleet, Massachussetts has been discovered in California. Formerly it was believed it had been torn down but now documents have been uncovered which proves that it was moved from the east coast to the west coast.  The strange story was uncovered by Colleen MacNeney and then reported in Lighthouse Digest. She says it was her most exciting discovery. MacNeney says she discovered correspondence that proved the lighthouse, first erected in 1881, had been moved by the Coast Guard from Wellfleet to Yerba Buena, Calif., and eventually to Point Montara. Lost lighthouse found. It isn’t known how the 30ft. lighthouse was transported across country but it is speculated that in 1925 when it was suppossedly destroyed, the all metal structure had its bolts removed and was loaded up on a train. Hence the trip to California. California here I come. Go west young lighthouse, go west. The lighthouse is still in use and doubles as a hostel.

MAN’S TUMOR IS A TOWEL

A Japanese man checked into  a hospital to have a tumour removed from his stomach. When examinations found what was believed to be an eight-centimetre (3.2-inch) tumour, he underwent the operation to remove it. It was only then that surgeons realised it was a towel. “The towel was greenish blue although we are not sure about its original colour,” the Asahi General Hospital spokesman said, adding it had been crumpled to the size of a softball. The patient had been carrying the cloth since 1983, when surgeons at the Asahi General Hospital in Chiba prefecture near Tokyo left it in him after an operation to treat an ulcer. I’m staying away from that hospital. That’s a little too careless for me. The man says he has no intention of sueing for the error. I don’t think I would be that understanding. No wonder the Prilosec wasn’t working.

AWESOME!
This is one of the most breathtaking videos I’ve ever seen. This was filmed in Kansas and now you know how Dorothy made it to OZ.

 

JEFF PECKMAN ALIEN VIDEO, UFO MARRIAGE, JAVAN RHINOS, DOG CAMPAIGNERS, AND NANO NOODLES

JEFF PECKMAN’S ALIEN VIDEO 

JEFF PECKMAN ON DAVID LETTERMAN – JUNE 10

JEFF PECKMAN AND STAN ROMANEK ON LARRY KING – MAY 30

Jeff Peckman of Denver, Colorado has promised the local city council a video that shows an alien peeping into a window. Did you know aliens peek? This video is suppossed to be a part of a documentary on the rise of alien visits. Jeff Peckman, who is pushing a ballot initiative to create an Extraterrestrial Affairs Commission in Denver to prepare the city for close encounters of the alien kind, said the video is authentic and convinced him that aliens exist. Must be they stopped by to catch a Rockies game. Peckman said the public will have to wait to see it because it’s being included in a documentary by Stan Romanek, a Colorado native who has reported UFO sightings. So, let’s see, we have an alien video that is going to be shown to the local city commission later today, but no one else gets to view it. That’s convincing. Maybe they are negotiating for a contract with Fox to show it, kind of like the “Alien Autopsy” thing was. “There is no doubt in my mind that (Stan Romanek, a Colorado native who has reported UFO sightings) did not post-produce this material. In other words, it’s not a trick done in special effects,” Jerry Hofmann, a professional film editor with more than 30 years of experience, said in a telephone interview. “I have equipment that will test to see if that shot was recorded originally on that tape, which it was,” he said. All that says is it was actually shot on video tape with no post production work. OK, no digitally enhanced special effects. Hofmann continues, “The thing is about 4 feet tall. The only thing that shows up in the video is his head. It pops up from underneath a window. But his eyes blink. His cheeks move. He turns his head side-to-side. This would be a very elaborate puppet.” It was very nice of that little alien to make sure they got frontal and profile views of him. Sort of reminds me of a mug shot. Well, the hype is on. The debate rages. Certainly the publicity groundwork is already done.  I can’t wait for this on DVD. Maybe the special features will show how they faked the whole thing. “We found this guy at the carney and thought, wow he kind of looks like an alien. He did it for a pack of smokes and some beer.” 

 

MARRIAGE PROPOSAL TRIGGERS UFO ALERT

Since we’re on the subject, in Berlin, Germany, police suddenly received several phone calls from citizens saying they’d sighted UFOs and unusual lights flying above the town of Plattling. This proves how easily people are fooled into believing that aliens are everywhere. When police arrived they found a 29-year old man had just proposed to his girlfriend. He’d thought it would be romantic if he sent up 50 paper lanterns to go with his special moment. The girlfriend said yes. Not every light in the sky is a prelude to invasion.

RARE JAVAN RHINOS

These are the world’s rarest rhinos. There are only around 70 Javan Rhinos in the wild, about 60 of which live in Ujung Kulon National Park on the western tip of Java island. The remainder live in Vietnam. In the first month of operation, five infrared video traps have captured two images of the camera-shy mother and calf, said Adhi Rachmat Hariyadi, head of the World Wildlife Federation’s Ujung Kulon project. “It is very unusual to catch a glimpse of the Javan Rhino deep inside the rain forest,” he said, adding the attacked camera was undamaged and put back on its stand the day after the incident. WWF officials say they plan to relocate several of the rhinos in the park to another part of Indonesia in the hope that they breed. Otherwise, they fear the species could be wiped out in the event of disease or natural disaster. Good luck with that one. I suspect they won’t go quietly.

DOGS USED AS CAMPAIGNERS 

 In Bacau, Romania, one of the locals campaigning for mayor has come up with an arguably strange idea to get the word out on his campaign. He has turned a pack of stray dogs loose with posters saying “Vote for Radu Nicolau” on their backs. Local animal rights groups are infuriated calling it sick exploitation. I’m not sure how sick it is, but it is creative. Mr. Nicolau was unrepentent, saying: “I love dogs and they can spread the word about my campaign to lots of places quicker than me and my campaign team could.” Plus I suspect, they work for biscuits. There’s nothing like turning loose a pack of dogs on your constiuents.

NANO-NOODLES AND NOODLE BOWL

In this Dec., 2006 photomicrograph released Thursday, May 29, 2008 by The Nakao Hamaguchi Laboratory of the University of Tokyo, a ‘carbon nanotube ramen’ in a bowl with diameter measuring one-thousandth of a millimeter (one-25,000th of an inch) produced by the university’s mechanical engineering Prof. Masayuki Nakao and his students in a project aimed at developing nanotube-processing technology is shown. ‘We believe it’s the world’s smallest ramen bowl, with the smallest portion of noodles inside, though they’re not edible,’ Nakao said. They wouldn’t do much for the appetite anyway. It could be a new concept for dieting though. The microscopic bowl was first created in December 2006, but was only released Thursday after it was entered for a microphotography competition. The students said they did it for fun. OK I have a different definition of fun. Does girls and rice beer mean anything?

HILLARY AND KENNEDY, EBAY CHILD AUCTION, INDIANA JONES BAN, AND VINCE YOUNG APOLOGY

 HILLARY CLINTON’S FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE

 It’s amazing how quickly a slip of the tongue will come back and haunt you. John Lennon knew about that when he made his comment that the Beatles were more popular than Jesus. Well, Hillary Clinton is the newest victim of the dreaded foot in mouth disease. The media has been running wild with her comment about the assassination of Robert F. Kennedy. She may have effectively hung herself politically. That would be too bad. She’s a fighter. Her go down swinging attitude I find refreshing. For those of you that have been living in a cave and have no idea of what I’m talking about, here’s the instant replay. Responding to a question from the Sioux Falls Argus Leader editorial board about calls for her to drop out of the race, she said: “My husband did not wrap up the nomination in 1992 until he won the California primary somewhere in the middle of June, right? We all remember Bobby Kennedy was assassinated in June in California. You know I just, I don’t understand it,” she said, dismissing the idea of abandoning the race. Clinton said she didn’t understand why, given this history, some Democrats were calling for her to quit. Of course, upon realizing she’d said something stupid, she immediately apologized, citing the Kennedy’s were on her mind because of Massachusett’s Senator Edward Kennedy having been diagnosed with a brain tumor. Right now, Clinton supporters are fleeing like rats deserting the proverbial sinking ship. I find it ironic that she holds Robert F. Kennedy’s former seat in New York. It will also be ironic that in a family that has always held the Kennedy’s in such high esteem that it should be Hillary’s downfall. Bill had always claimed that JFK was his hero and during his campaign that picture of him meeting JFK when he was a boy was everywhere. I think maybe she should simply claim a momentary lapse of reason. We all have them. Like Flip Wilson used to say: “The Devil made me do it, The Devil made me do it.” “Doctor, you’re wanted in surgery, Mrs. Clinton needs her foot removed from her mouth.” Foot in mouth, debilitating politicians since the beginning of time.

PARENTS TRY TO SELL CHILD ON EBAY

Well, Ebay has become the place for strange auctions. A couple from Berlin, Germany has put their 7 month old boy up for auction for one Euro, about $1.57. Peter Hieber, a spokesman for police in the Bavarian town of Krumbach, said the baby was placed in the care of youth services, although the child’s mother insisted the ad was only a joke. It’s not much of a joke if you ask me. Authorities have launched an investigation into possible child trafficking against the baby’s mother and father, neither of whom was identified. “Offering my nearly new baby for sale, as it has gotten too loud. It is a male baby, nearly 28 inches long and can be used either in a baby carrier or a stroller,” police quoted the Ebay listing. I wonder how much shipping was. No offers were made for the child in the two hours and 30 minutes the ad was posted on Tuesday. I’m surprised, that was a pretty cheap price for a rugrat. Ebay later deleted the posting, but assisted police in tracking down the parents. I wonder what Ebay policy this one violated.

RUSSIAN COMMUNISTS CALL FOR BAN ON NEW INDIANA JONES MOVIE

Not everyone is a fan of the new Indiana Jones movie. Members of the Russian Communist party are calling for a ban on the film because of Cate Blanchett’s portrayal of a 1950’s KGB agent. Russian Communist Party members condemned the new “Indiana Jones” film on Friday as crude, anti-Soviet propaganda that distorts history. Ya think? I’ve never looked to an Indiana Jones movie for a history lesson.  “What galls is how together with America we defeated Hitler, and how we sympathized when Bin Laden hit them. But they go ahead and scare kids with Communists. These people have no shame,” said Viktor Perov, a Communist Party member in Russia‘s second city of St. Petersburg. Can you say, over-reacting? The film, was released in Russian cinemas on Thursday. Russian media said it was being shown on 808 screens, the widest ever release for a Hollywood movie. Well, a controversy never hurts to get folks into the theater. This could score a lot of rubles for Indy. I wonder what Harrison Ford sounds like in Russian. Do their lips sync or are they like those old martial arts movies from the 60’s.  

 

VINCE YOUNG APOLOGIZES – KIND OF

Because of pressure about the party pictures of him all over the internet, including this site, Vince Young has apologized, sort of. Vince apologizes thusly:”I apologize to some of the kids if they did see it because I am trying to be a role model for them. But at the same time, I was just trying to have fun with (friends). That is the life of a quarterback, somebody of my status. I guess somebody was trying to make some money and sold the picture to the web site. But at the same time that is the life I chose to live. But it is not going to stop me from having fun. I just have to watch myself. They always want to try and get some negative pub on me. It wasn’t really nothing bad. … Everybody deserves to have a good time every once in a while during the offseason.” Let’s see, every once in a while. Let’s check the QB’s schedule, shall we?
Vince Young’s White Tee Party @ the ROC Wednesdays – 5.14.08
Vince Young’s Invite Only Pool Party at the Westside Tennis Club – 5.15.08
Vince Young’s Birthday Weekend KickOff Party & Premiere of the iBar – 5.16.08
Vince, Shawn Marion & Jevon Kearse host Baby Blue Carpet Affair @ Club Level – 5.17.08
Vince Young Bday BBQ Cookout & Daytime party at the Red Door – 5.18.08
Lil Wayne, Lloyd, Mannie Fresh, Lil Keke at Vince Young Bday Bash at BAR RIO – 5.18.08
Looks to me like every once in a while is every day. Liver transplant for Vince Young. Liver Transplant for Vince Young. If you follow the links above you can get a look at each one of the parties. They were careful not to show Vince actually drinking this time, but one actually shows the cops arriving at the Baby Blue Carpet Affair though you have to go through 10 pages of pics to get to it. Getting in shape for the pre-season, eh Vince.

 

CLINTON DOWN – NOT OUT, DEATH BY PLAYSTATION, NEIL YOUNG SPIDER, STUCK DOG, AND MOM’S OVERTURE

 HILLARY CLINTON LOOKS AHEAD TO WEST VIRGINIA

Whether you support her or not, you have to give her credit for not giving up easily. Hillary spent Mother’s Day in West Virginia in a effort to take that state’s primary on Tuesday. Obama spent the weekend in Chicago counting his chickens before they’ve hatched by planning his post convention campaign. Clinton is currently the picture of tenacity as she continues in a campaign that many have declared officially dead. She has stated that she is in it until June and it appears that she means it. One thing’s for sure, Hillary is going down swinging if she goes down at all. She may surprise everyone by having a political near death experience. Everybody out of the way. Charge up the pads. Clear. We’ve got a heartbeat.

 

MAN KILLS NEIGHBOR OVER PLAYSTATION

Edward Stoddard Jr. from Land O Lakes, Florida, suspected his neighbor, Douglas Abrams of borrowing his Playstation 3. The two apparently argued over it and Stoddard shot Abrams, killing him. I would say this guy needed to get a life but now that’s not an option. He’s currently housed in the Dade County lockup awaiting trial. Well I bet he won’t get his PS3 in prison. He’s going to learn about a brand new game, It’s called “Bend over I’ll drive.” The graphics are very realistic.

NEIL YOUNG SPIDER

Neil Young has had a spider named after him. An East Carolina University biologist named Bond, Jason Bond, has discovered a new species of Trap Door Spider and has named it after his favorite musician, Myrmekiaphila neilyoungi. Why a trap door spider reminds him of Neil Young has eluded me but hey it’s a nice gesture anyway.  Bond says that spiders are determined from one species to the next by differences in their genitalia. Now I’m really lost as to what this has to do with Neil Young. Is he an exgroupie? Does he know something about Neil the rest of us don’t? It make you want to go HMMMM. 

BATMOBILE ON EBAY

Apparently the Tim Burton Batmobile is going up for auction on Ebay for half a mil. It can’t be coincidence that this is just in time for the release of the new Batman movie “the Dark Knight.” Yes, you can now cruise around pretending that You, Yes, you can be the caped crusader. Now if you can get one of your friends to don the idiot tights of Robin you can hit the bars. It should send all the girls to you because they certainly aren’t going to him. Buy a beer for the “Wingman.”

DOG FOUND IN TRUCK ENGINE

I may know whay you vehicle has been running doggy lately. Have you ever opend up the hood of your vehicle and found a …dog? Squirrels, chipmunks, I’ve come across a lot of small critters in there but never a dog. Walter Witthoef opened the hood of his F-150 and there staring at him was a stuck pit bull terrier. He had somehow wriggled his way into the back of the engine and was impatiently waiting for someone to let him out or give him a biscuit. To amuse himself while he waited, he sat and chewed on everything in sight. Ah boredom. Animal services arrived and freed the dog who was then reunited with his owner, none the worse for wear. Next time your vehicle won’t start, check the plugs, check the wires and don’t forget to look for the dog.

 

NOW FOR OUR COMEDY MOMENT OF THE DAY: If you haven’t seen this you really need to. Ode to Mom by Anita Renfroe

SAN DIEGO STATE UNIVERSITY, GAS PROTESTER, SERIAL PINCHER AND WORLD’S OLDEST PHOTO

SAN DIEGO STATE UNIVERSITY SUSPENDS ANIMAL HOUSES

Was there any studying going on here? In a move to sort out the aftermath of nearly 100 students getting busted for drugs, San Diego State University has suspended fraternities on their campus pending investigation and review. Certainly going to college is suppossed to prepare you for a future career, but this is not what academia had in mind. The animal houses have apparently degenerated into the crack houses. This takes toga parties to a whole new level.

 MAN ARRESTED FOR SINGING AGAINST GAS PRICES

Jay Weinberg climbed atop a convenience store in Valparaiso, Indiana and gave a quick concert. His song, called “Price Gougin’,” was to protest the high gas prices. He had about 20 people standing around listening and a few at the pumps singing along when the police arrived to arrest him for trespassing and disorderly conduct. OK, first, how do you trespass at a public business? Second, I thought protest singers were a tradition in this country. You know, Bob Dylan, Pete Seeger, Woody Guthrie. I think he should book a tour of gas stations everywhere. Go on the road. But then I suppose the gas would cost too much. If he turned it into a video though it could be a Youtube/Myspace hit.

SERIAL BUTT PINCHER ON THE LOOSE

Here’s one for the books. According to reports, there is a serial butt pincher on the loose in Manchester, England. Local police are trying to put the pinch on him. He is described as a Greek/Turkish looking man and has pinched 19 women so far all ranging from 13-43 years of age. He apparently appreciates variety in his pinching. The victims say it puts them in a very uncomfortable position and want the pincher caught. Is this actually illegal?

NCAA CRACKS DOWN ON STUPIDITY

The NCAA has decided to penalize 53 Division 1 sports programs for poor academic performance in their players. Wow, they actually expect these guys to learn something? A total of 218 teams at 123 schools have been cited. This covers Football and Basketball, including Orange Bowl Champion Kansas. It seems they were recruiting for athletics, not brains. Go figure.

WORLD’S OLDEST PHOTOGRAPH

This may be the world’s oldest photograph. It is set to be sold at Sotheby’s and it is unknown how much money this might bring in. It is from around 1800. They are about to run a test on it to try and get a more precise date for its origin. It was made by laying a leaf on a light sensitive silver nitrate plate and then exposing it. It’s sort of like how people now sit their butts on a Xerox machine at office parties.